The Sparks of War

I’m just here personally to lay down some things to double/triple down on clarifying things as well as further staple down clarifications on my current stance. 

Firstly I’d like to say I’m super highly disappointed and irritated at how this continues to progress. People that I considered friends still to this day continue to throw me under the rug just to help place themselves on some type of victim stance and win people’s sympathy. People continuing to try their hardest to ignore their faults and instead conjure these nonexistent scenarios to try to paint people as bad people. I just really don’t understand this at all. Why are people stooping this low for no reason? 

I want to know why my name keeps getting called out and slandered? Where is this coming from? From every single discussion and interaction I've had between people regarding my reasonings for wanting to stay away, the things I’ve addressed, and my stance on this whole conflict, never have I once been hostile, disrespectful, manipulative, or anything bad. I’ve explained clear as day everything(at least to my current knowledge) in detail my intents, my actions, and my thoughts/feelings yet still I find all these left field comments towards me people trying to paint me as some type of villain. I do not like people spreading these things to other people who don’t know the situation and all of a sudden flip a switch on me because you still keep to your delusions of what I’m apparently doing and why I’m doing this/that. I’m really tired of this.

It’s really hurtful to see these situations happen because when you spread stupid shit like this you start to ruin relationships because of your own selfish perspective. A perspective with nothing backing u up but your own words. I’m tired of having to repeat myself over and over and over again just for the person I thought finally was starting to get what I was putting down only to swag me in the back and continue spreading more bullshit to others. 

Let me say this again. I am NOT part of some secret organization Akatsuki type gang squad that’s out to get nova. My problem isn’t even with nova it’s with certain people and certain scenarios that I’ve addressed. Unlike some people I’m not just gonna auto group an entire community together as if everyone has the same objective. I’m not on team Spin. I never said that yiffy was a pedo. I’m away for my own personal reasons. 

I do not care for power nor do I want to force any type of change. I have nothing against anybody. To the people believing the bullshit 
I will not blame any of you since you don’t know the full of it in the first place. I understand from an outsider perspective it seems sketchy so I wouldn’t blame you Ik I’d do the exact same thing and just trust the 
thing being said initially(but I would investigate it instead of just have blind faith in what’s being said).

I’m here as an individual. I left nova partially for this very reason. Why should I stay in an environment that only wishes to throw me down and never listen to me? Why am I an asshole for leaving when I’m uncomfortable? I used to question people who would leave nova just because of a simple quarrel or something but I understand now why they did it. I never realized how bad it was for me for all these yrs and just brushed it off because I was used to it. After not having access to nova during January and experiencing what it was like to b in a community that didn’t just belittle and discard me, I realized the relief of not being around so much bs felt like for once so for my mental stability staying away was the viable choice. 

I’ve woken up to so many things and was able to realize how toxic I've really been becoming as a whole on nova and all that was not healthy at all for me to stay in. 

So please for the love of god I don’t want this spreading nonsense to continue. Anything regarding me direct them to me don’t just say some bs that pops in your mind. I do not want other friends gaining some bullshit ideas and it ends up messing up relations. Slander is a serious thing that I do not tolerate and I’ve let it slide for way too long. If you don’t respect this then don’t ever speak to me again. 

For reference as well further on my clarifications please read back on other previous forum posts tht I've, once again, made myself perfectly clear on.

Just saying dude, the main person I saw saying you were being a villain was Onox. You shouldn't take his opinion on things personally. As you know, he's hardly the voice of the people. You're in our server and should be able to see what other people are saying about you. 

Most of us aren't saying people such as yourself NEED to stay in Nova. I for one understand that you are an individual and are free to do as you wish. If people need to leave for the sake of happiness they should. Nova isn't a cult and people can leave whenever they want. It's not like people who disappear for a year, 2 years or even forever are resented for it. As for people belittling you in Nova, I did see a bit of that but I assumed it was more about you butting heads with people due to your villain rp, talk of embracing evil and your irl choices which other members didn't agree with on a moral standpoint (not that it makes it right of course.) Just saying,  I have had nothing but respect for you despite some of the things you've said in the past which I didn't like or disagreed with.

As for slander, it goes both ways. I've seen a bit of it being said about Nova too.

Anyway, it's good that you feel healthier though man. I do care about all my friends mental health. It's also good you were able to break out of the toxicity although I don't think Nova are fully to blame for you previously being toxic. It probably played a part sure as you were given quite a bit of freedom there, but there was clearly other factors too. I also don't think a majority of Nova resent you for being some kind of villain so you shouldn't worry too much about that.

Thanks that means a lot Mitch. I’ve just been in a confused state on many things lately and can’t piece anything together. I just didn’t want people to think I was leaving to spite or rebel or something. I just need time away to reflect and really gauge things. Too many controversial things consistently have weighed on me for too long and it finally cracked me.

tch, how pathetic char.