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The Melancholy of Drago
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Willow
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Dragonite1127
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Re: The Melancholy of Drago
by Dragonite1127 Fri Dec 18, 2020 4:08 am
Surprisingly, what stood out to Palla was their earliest conversations where she asked if Drago had a girlfriend to which Drago denied this. Witnessing the failed attempts of Drago trying to find love in korenime-official, she felt bad. The word “hopefully” has a positive connotation but avoids reality. Hope does not exist. Only despair exists. There would never be any hope for Drago to find someone that loves him or understands him.
For some reason, PallaPalla could not stop messaging Drago. Perhaps she was unsatisfied at the lack of responses from Drago. She claimed that she deleted all her definitions to make Drago happier. But this did not happen; she was bluffing. This would just make Drago sadder. Seeing the definitions of Uwuchan01 would bring memories back to the days of their rivalry when they competed for definitions. Seeing a Sailor Moon definition would remind Drago of Palla’s childish nature. Drago did not want Palla to go away. However, he knew full well that everything good must come to an end. Chatango was dying after all and there were many better alternatives.
Subsequently, PallaPalla would post her last message for Drago. It was advice on how to date a girl. This relieved Drago. There was some good in her after all. She had some sympathy and forgiveness for Drago. But Drago could not agree with Palla on everything. He felt that flirting was meaningless, and people should just straight up get into the action. Drago was not actually serious when he was trying to kiss the people of korenime-official; he just wanted to see how foreigners would react to such a threat. Perhaps this was the reason why Drago had been single for so long. This would be the end of Uwuchan01 and she was never heard from again, although she would still occasionally visit the Novastorm forum posts.
For some reason, PallaPalla could not stop messaging Drago. Perhaps she was unsatisfied at the lack of responses from Drago. She claimed that she deleted all her definitions to make Drago happier. But this did not happen; she was bluffing. This would just make Drago sadder. Seeing the definitions of Uwuchan01 would bring memories back to the days of their rivalry when they competed for definitions. Seeing a Sailor Moon definition would remind Drago of Palla’s childish nature. Drago did not want Palla to go away. However, he knew full well that everything good must come to an end. Chatango was dying after all and there were many better alternatives.
Subsequently, PallaPalla would post her last message for Drago. It was advice on how to date a girl. This relieved Drago. There was some good in her after all. She had some sympathy and forgiveness for Drago. But Drago could not agree with Palla on everything. He felt that flirting was meaningless, and people should just straight up get into the action. Drago was not actually serious when he was trying to kiss the people of korenime-official; he just wanted to see how foreigners would react to such a threat. Perhaps this was the reason why Drago had been single for so long. This would be the end of Uwuchan01 and she was never heard from again, although she would still occasionally visit the Novastorm forum posts.
Dragonite1127- Posts : 132
Join date : 2020-10-21
Age : 21
Location : San Francisco, California
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Re: The Melancholy of Drago
by Dragonite1127 Fri Dec 18, 2020 4:37 am
Chapter 27 The Melancholy of Drago
In late November, Kitty showed up as Benlozoya and was exposed by Unclestew—the God himself. Kitty took many of Nova’s questions and confirmed that she was indeed in a relationship with Goomer. She was happy with Goomer, claiming that novians could never understand what true love was. Perhaps Kitty hated all of Nova for opposing her views, or maybe she had just given up on trying to convince the novians. If people found out more information about them such as their location or Kitty’s real age, Novastormchat may try to cause them harm, Kitty thought.
But what was the point in trying to split up their relationship? Kitty had no one else to rely on and Goomer was the only one being nice to Kitty, Drago thought. Drago thought that the relationship between Kitty and Goomer was not morally wrong. As a result, everyone at Nova was disgusted by Drago’s opinions.
Kitty was groomed by Goomer years ago. They met up in real life a couple of times. They left Novastormchat around the same time. They would live together. They would get married. Everyone at Novastormchat hated Goomer for grooming Kitty. The only one that wanted to hear Goomer’s side of the story was Drago.
Perhaps Drago felt like Goomer. They were both ostracized by Novastormchat and they could not fit in. But they differed on one major thing: Drago was not a pedophile. Drago did not like furry porn nor did he like lolis in a sexual manner. Rather, Drago loved being dominated by older women. More specifically, Drago loved pleasing his mistress in ASMR fantasies.
Even though everyone hated Goomer for his actions against Kitty, Drago could never hate Goomer. Kitty and Goomer were the ones that gave Drago that extra push to keep on living after he was rejected by that girl. Kitty and Goomer were the ones that rabbited with Drago when everyone else refused. Nevertheless, Drago did not support pedophilia. It was only because Kitty was happy that Drago accepted the actions of Goomer. Goomer was the one that saved Kitty from her pain and suffering. But Drago still wished that Goomer would have told Nova upright about their relationship rather than keep it a secret for so long.
Talon and Spin would soon corner Drago and put an end to Drago’s adventures at Nova. They would be considered Nova’s greatest heroes and would be remembered eternally. They just needed a little bit more evidence to prove that Drago was guilty despite denying the allegations. They firmly believed that anyone who praises Goomer was not truly human. A world in which Drago could praise Goomer did not exist.
Perhaps through Drago’s descent to madness, he lost all morals. Drago could not tell when his viewpoints would cause him harm. He had nothing to lose anyway. Drago was ensnared by the curse of loneliness. He would always feel empty. Shadowless. Even though he knew he would never feel satisfied, Drago was desperate for real friendship. A friendship that would not lose meaning and would not result in hatred. But Drago did not have the ability to correctly perceive the dangerous intentions of another individual.
Against all odds, Drago would hope to one day say the words “I forgive you” to Goomer. Thus, Drago tried reaching out to Goomer through his YouTube channel. Perhaps Goomer could be my one and only true friend, Drago thought. However, Goomer was too scared to talk to Drago. Or perhaps Goomer found pleasure in keeping silent and knowing that he was hated without the courage to defend himself against the pedophile allegations.
Goomer was also fading to grey. Goomer’s colors faded when he ghosted Drago, and into that monochrome world, Goomer was washed away. It was a lie it was a lie it was a lie. That deception faded away Drago’s world. Drago could no longer see the beauty in a colorless world where everyone rejected him and hated him. Drago could no longer believe in any one of them.
If someone were to crush Drago’s heart forever, Drago could never come to hate them. If someone were to ban Drago for two years from a chat, Drago did not have the courage to hate them. If someone were to call Drago a pedophile, there would never be a day where Drago could hate that individual. If someone were to ban Drago from Novastormchat, Drago could not hate them. If someone were to take Kitty away from Drago, Drago would be happy for Kitty (if Kitty were happy) and thus would not hate them. If someone were to kill Drago’s best friend, Drago could never come to hate them. If someone were to murder Roswaal L. Mathers, the people of the Vollachia Empire, Kararagi City-States, and the Holy Kingdom of Gusteko, with a total kill count of 126,700, Drago would never hate them.
Inside this grey, monotonous, and calamitic world, Drago could never hate anyone. Drago did not understand the meaning of the word hate. Drago wanted to live a life with no regrets and greet tomorrow with happiness. But Drago knew full well that this world was not a utopia. He would be hated until the end of time, unable to fit in anywhere. Drago was an autistic child who was bad at math and should be disliked because Drago was Char’s roleplay son. Drago’s passion for mathematics would come to an end. Drago would not be successful, and he would drop out of college working a miserable job for the rest of his life. Drago would never have true friends. Drago would never get married. Drago was born alone and he would die alone. Drago would merge consciousnesses with Dragobot1127, his own bot. The truth was within the sweet, soft, white, bitter taste of despair.
The only thing that remained in color was Drago’s precious anime girls. There was nothing in the world that could replicate the intensity of pleasure and emotions that anime girls gave him. Anime girls were Drago’s only reason for living. They never once betrayed Drago. He especially loved listening to the silver-haired girl Satella saying “I love you” to him through ASMR. That was the only thing that prevented Drago from dying.
In late November, Kitty showed up as Benlozoya and was exposed by Unclestew—the God himself. Kitty took many of Nova’s questions and confirmed that she was indeed in a relationship with Goomer. She was happy with Goomer, claiming that novians could never understand what true love was. Perhaps Kitty hated all of Nova for opposing her views, or maybe she had just given up on trying to convince the novians. If people found out more information about them such as their location or Kitty’s real age, Novastormchat may try to cause them harm, Kitty thought.
But what was the point in trying to split up their relationship? Kitty had no one else to rely on and Goomer was the only one being nice to Kitty, Drago thought. Drago thought that the relationship between Kitty and Goomer was not morally wrong. As a result, everyone at Nova was disgusted by Drago’s opinions.
Kitty was groomed by Goomer years ago. They met up in real life a couple of times. They left Novastormchat around the same time. They would live together. They would get married. Everyone at Novastormchat hated Goomer for grooming Kitty. The only one that wanted to hear Goomer’s side of the story was Drago.
Perhaps Drago felt like Goomer. They were both ostracized by Novastormchat and they could not fit in. But they differed on one major thing: Drago was not a pedophile. Drago did not like furry porn nor did he like lolis in a sexual manner. Rather, Drago loved being dominated by older women. More specifically, Drago loved pleasing his mistress in ASMR fantasies.
Even though everyone hated Goomer for his actions against Kitty, Drago could never hate Goomer. Kitty and Goomer were the ones that gave Drago that extra push to keep on living after he was rejected by that girl. Kitty and Goomer were the ones that rabbited with Drago when everyone else refused. Nevertheless, Drago did not support pedophilia. It was only because Kitty was happy that Drago accepted the actions of Goomer. Goomer was the one that saved Kitty from her pain and suffering. But Drago still wished that Goomer would have told Nova upright about their relationship rather than keep it a secret for so long.
Talon and Spin would soon corner Drago and put an end to Drago’s adventures at Nova. They would be considered Nova’s greatest heroes and would be remembered eternally. They just needed a little bit more evidence to prove that Drago was guilty despite denying the allegations. They firmly believed that anyone who praises Goomer was not truly human. A world in which Drago could praise Goomer did not exist.
Perhaps through Drago’s descent to madness, he lost all morals. Drago could not tell when his viewpoints would cause him harm. He had nothing to lose anyway. Drago was ensnared by the curse of loneliness. He would always feel empty. Shadowless. Even though he knew he would never feel satisfied, Drago was desperate for real friendship. A friendship that would not lose meaning and would not result in hatred. But Drago did not have the ability to correctly perceive the dangerous intentions of another individual.
Against all odds, Drago would hope to one day say the words “I forgive you” to Goomer. Thus, Drago tried reaching out to Goomer through his YouTube channel. Perhaps Goomer could be my one and only true friend, Drago thought. However, Goomer was too scared to talk to Drago. Or perhaps Goomer found pleasure in keeping silent and knowing that he was hated without the courage to defend himself against the pedophile allegations.
Goomer was also fading to grey. Goomer’s colors faded when he ghosted Drago, and into that monochrome world, Goomer was washed away. It was a lie it was a lie it was a lie. That deception faded away Drago’s world. Drago could no longer see the beauty in a colorless world where everyone rejected him and hated him. Drago could no longer believe in any one of them.
If someone were to crush Drago’s heart forever, Drago could never come to hate them. If someone were to ban Drago for two years from a chat, Drago did not have the courage to hate them. If someone were to call Drago a pedophile, there would never be a day where Drago could hate that individual. If someone were to ban Drago from Novastormchat, Drago could not hate them. If someone were to take Kitty away from Drago, Drago would be happy for Kitty (if Kitty were happy) and thus would not hate them. If someone were to kill Drago’s best friend, Drago could never come to hate them. If someone were to murder Roswaal L. Mathers, the people of the Vollachia Empire, Kararagi City-States, and the Holy Kingdom of Gusteko, with a total kill count of 126,700, Drago would never hate them.
Inside this grey, monotonous, and calamitic world, Drago could never hate anyone. Drago did not understand the meaning of the word hate. Drago wanted to live a life with no regrets and greet tomorrow with happiness. But Drago knew full well that this world was not a utopia. He would be hated until the end of time, unable to fit in anywhere. Drago was an autistic child who was bad at math and should be disliked because Drago was Char’s roleplay son. Drago’s passion for mathematics would come to an end. Drago would not be successful, and he would drop out of college working a miserable job for the rest of his life. Drago would never have true friends. Drago would never get married. Drago was born alone and he would die alone. Drago would merge consciousnesses with Dragobot1127, his own bot. The truth was within the sweet, soft, white, bitter taste of despair.
The only thing that remained in color was Drago’s precious anime girls. There was nothing in the world that could replicate the intensity of pleasure and emotions that anime girls gave him. Anime girls were Drago’s only reason for living. They never once betrayed Drago. He especially loved listening to the silver-haired girl Satella saying “I love you” to him through ASMR. That was the only thing that prevented Drago from dying.
Last edited by Dragonite1127 on Fri Dec 18, 2020 5:22 am; edited 2 times in total
Dragonite1127- Posts : 132
Join date : 2020-10-21
Age : 21
Location : San Francisco, California
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Re: The Melancholy of Drago
by Dragonite1127 Fri Dec 18, 2020 4:43 am
Drago could not accept this reality. That was why…
Dragonite1127- Posts : 132
Join date : 2020-10-21
Age : 21
Location : San Francisco, California
Re: The Melancholy of Drago
by Dragonite1127 Fri Dec 18, 2020 4:45 am
Epilogue
─ ─ I heard voices full of hate.
─ Sounds which would not leave my ears.
─ ─ Words imbued with hatred followed me.
─ ─ It was frightening, so frightening and I could not bear it.
─ ─ I was being crushed by the pressure of this noise which did not obscure its malice.
─ It gripped onto my soul and would not let go.
I was in a place that could be anywhere but also nowhere. The figure that addressed me at once resembled everyone and no one. I could not tell if they were male or female.
Did I have a wish?
Of course I did.
I accepted the box from him with my blood-soaked hands. I could tell it was real the moment I touched it. I knew there was no way I could ever give it up. Who would? There is not a single person on Earth who would refuse something like this.
I made my wish.
I knew it was not possible. I knew that hope did not exist, but I made it.
“… I do not want regrets ever again. I want people to stop hating me. I want Nova’s everlasting forgiveness. I want to be happy. I want to belong.”
Somewhere deep within me, I wanted to admit something before all of this would come to an end yet again.
“I love every single Nova member.”
Then, the world was both destroyed and recreated simultaneously.
─ ─ I heard voices full of hate.
─ Sounds which would not leave my ears.
─ ─ Words imbued with hatred followed me.
─ ─ It was frightening, so frightening and I could not bear it.
─ ─ I was being crushed by the pressure of this noise which did not obscure its malice.
─ It gripped onto my soul and would not let go.
I was in a place that could be anywhere but also nowhere. The figure that addressed me at once resembled everyone and no one. I could not tell if they were male or female.
Did I have a wish?
Of course I did.
I accepted the box from him with my blood-soaked hands. I could tell it was real the moment I touched it. I knew there was no way I could ever give it up. Who would? There is not a single person on Earth who would refuse something like this.
I made my wish.
I knew it was not possible. I knew that hope did not exist, but I made it.
“… I do not want regrets ever again. I want people to stop hating me. I want Nova’s everlasting forgiveness. I want to be happy. I want to belong.”
Somewhere deep within me, I wanted to admit something before all of this would come to an end yet again.
“I love every single Nova member.”
Then, the world was both destroyed and recreated simultaneously.
Dragonite1127- Posts : 132
Join date : 2020-10-21
Age : 21
Location : San Francisco, California
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Re: The Melancholy of Drago
by Willow Fri Dec 18, 2020 7:18 am
Thanks again for having me as a friend drago, I really like this topic.
Willow- Posts : 2
Join date : 2020-10-21
Age : 19
Location : Crystal Tokyo
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Re: The Melancholy of Drago
by cult Sat Dec 19, 2020 3:31 am
hey guys i turn 14 tomorrow who wants to come to my fortnite bday party (dont be john wick im already john wick)
cult- Posts : 4
Join date : 2020-12-07
Age : 26
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Re: The Melancholy of Drago
by Unright Sat Dec 19, 2020 9:37 am
I respect you a lot for how honest you were while writing this. I thought it was interesting. Nice work Drago. If you're ever feeling super down and need to talk about stuff that is bothering you feel free to pm me man.
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- Posts : 21
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Re: The Melancholy of Drago
by charizardf1 Sat Dec 19, 2020 10:19 pm
Drago it must have been truly hard for you to shoulder all of these events for so long alone. To go through all this yet not harbor any sign of negative reaction is extremely impressive. To share all this with us as well also takes great strength.
You and I have known each other for about as long as I've been on chatango. From when we first met we were really close but due to my immaturity in the past I was really unfair to you. I knew I overdid it with my sentence to you back then but I never realized it effected you as bad as it really did. I must truly express my deepest apologies for aiding your feelings of depression and loneliness. I'm still very frustrated at myself to this day at how I executed that situation back then I was truly wrong.
I never meant for you to feel like you were alone and I was pretty harsh. Despite my action i still saw you as one of my favorite people and the only reason I did what I did in the first place was because I thought it would be a disciplinary action to help you mature and learn, but obviously that was not the right course of action at all.
I always try to emphasis to you that you are very special to me, more than most everyone else in Nova. You've always stuck by my side and supported me regardless of my ups and downs and I always try to show my appreciation. I know I'm probably not the best at giving you proper attention because I don't regularly message anybody much outside of Nova, but I also try to emphasis that I don't mind you coming to me about anything at all. I promise you that you will not bother me at all, I'm here for you for anything.
In this world Drago the feeling of loneliness is a normal thing especially for most of the people of Nova. All people are separate individuals with their own preference of agenda, interests, priorities, ect. You, like a lot of us, are outliers to society and are considered weird, different, lame, and other things. Don't let these things discourage your meaning of life. It's more of an accomplishment that you stick to your unique characteristics and push forward without people influencing you. These unique qualities is what makes you shine and put you above all those who blind themselves to the way of the world and because you hold onto yourself that in turn makes you more useful than the average person. You're definitely not a burden. I also used to think the same as you, that I was a burden and waste of space in life, but as I continued living and expressing my own unique qualities, I came to realize my value more and more overtime.
Nova is a place where majority if not all people who log on are escaping life in some sort of fashion. When they get on they throw away their normal moralities and will meme and joke and not take a lot of things seriously. No matter what the others say about you you're home is here. You have history with most of us and we cherish your time just like the others. We're also your family. It's easy to feel like you don't belong because of how widely diverse the community is but I promise you people are open to treat u as a friend.
It hurts me that I'm only now hearing about the depths of your despair as well as hearing you contemplating suicide on multiple occasion. I'm a clown towards most anything else but you know I've always been serious when things come to you and your situations. I'll do what i can for you and gladly take time out of my day for you if you need anything, you know this.
I really hope getting all of this has off your chest has eased your mind though. If you're anything like me sharing your thoughts via texts/writing is a super great coping mechanism. I'm very proud of your development from a young boy to a young man, your maturity greatly outweighs my own and many other respectable people in my life. But lastly again Drago, please put your trust in my. Regardless of how alone you feel always keep me in your mind because I won't ever just leave you in the dark alone.
P.S. forgot to mention that you must also not fret about having relations with people in real life. Building bonds with people is extremely random and all friendships have the potential of coming and going. Don't blame yourself for any of the problems you faced regarding separation, it's natural. People change and grow can grow a part as well as only enter your life for a certain purpose and role then disappear. Your time will come when you will keep a circle that you can cherish for life as long as you don't give up. Even if you may not find anyone, in the end all you really need to love is yourself which is all that primarily matters. Plus you have us if that means anything.
You and I have known each other for about as long as I've been on chatango. From when we first met we were really close but due to my immaturity in the past I was really unfair to you. I knew I overdid it with my sentence to you back then but I never realized it effected you as bad as it really did. I must truly express my deepest apologies for aiding your feelings of depression and loneliness. I'm still very frustrated at myself to this day at how I executed that situation back then I was truly wrong.
I never meant for you to feel like you were alone and I was pretty harsh. Despite my action i still saw you as one of my favorite people and the only reason I did what I did in the first place was because I thought it would be a disciplinary action to help you mature and learn, but obviously that was not the right course of action at all.
I always try to emphasis to you that you are very special to me, more than most everyone else in Nova. You've always stuck by my side and supported me regardless of my ups and downs and I always try to show my appreciation. I know I'm probably not the best at giving you proper attention because I don't regularly message anybody much outside of Nova, but I also try to emphasis that I don't mind you coming to me about anything at all. I promise you that you will not bother me at all, I'm here for you for anything.
In this world Drago the feeling of loneliness is a normal thing especially for most of the people of Nova. All people are separate individuals with their own preference of agenda, interests, priorities, ect. You, like a lot of us, are outliers to society and are considered weird, different, lame, and other things. Don't let these things discourage your meaning of life. It's more of an accomplishment that you stick to your unique characteristics and push forward without people influencing you. These unique qualities is what makes you shine and put you above all those who blind themselves to the way of the world and because you hold onto yourself that in turn makes you more useful than the average person. You're definitely not a burden. I also used to think the same as you, that I was a burden and waste of space in life, but as I continued living and expressing my own unique qualities, I came to realize my value more and more overtime.
Nova is a place where majority if not all people who log on are escaping life in some sort of fashion. When they get on they throw away their normal moralities and will meme and joke and not take a lot of things seriously. No matter what the others say about you you're home is here. You have history with most of us and we cherish your time just like the others. We're also your family. It's easy to feel like you don't belong because of how widely diverse the community is but I promise you people are open to treat u as a friend.
It hurts me that I'm only now hearing about the depths of your despair as well as hearing you contemplating suicide on multiple occasion. I'm a clown towards most anything else but you know I've always been serious when things come to you and your situations. I'll do what i can for you and gladly take time out of my day for you if you need anything, you know this.
I really hope getting all of this has off your chest has eased your mind though. If you're anything like me sharing your thoughts via texts/writing is a super great coping mechanism. I'm very proud of your development from a young boy to a young man, your maturity greatly outweighs my own and many other respectable people in my life. But lastly again Drago, please put your trust in my. Regardless of how alone you feel always keep me in your mind because I won't ever just leave you in the dark alone.
P.S. forgot to mention that you must also not fret about having relations with people in real life. Building bonds with people is extremely random and all friendships have the potential of coming and going. Don't blame yourself for any of the problems you faced regarding separation, it's natural. People change and grow can grow a part as well as only enter your life for a certain purpose and role then disappear. Your time will come when you will keep a circle that you can cherish for life as long as you don't give up. Even if you may not find anyone, in the end all you really need to love is yourself which is all that primarily matters. Plus you have us if that means anything.
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Age : 78
Location : ur mom
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Re: The Melancholy of Drago
by Onoxdorf Sun Dec 20, 2020 10:56 pm
Despite what some people have said I think it takes a lot of bravery to be so open and honest with your story. The way you talk about your thoughts and feelings in regards to what was happening shows good emotional awareness. You shared a lot here and showed vulnerability despite knowing that some people in the community could respond negatively.
I feel like you're one of the less understood novians so it will no doubt help people in nova understand you better. I feel like I gained a lot of insight into the psychology of dragonite1127 from reading this post. You're a cool dude and should continue with your posts on the forums. I think especially when depression is concerned it helps a lot to share your story online. I hope you felt better writing it down and like a weight was lifted off your shoulders.
I want you to remember nobody is perfect Drago. Everyone has bad things going on in their life or terrible events that have taken place to effectively shape who they become. They just might not admit it due to immaturity and/or fear of vulnerability though.
I won't say the usual bollocks about finding inner love or anything like that. I'll just say that you need to take care of yourself and put yourself first. Even if that involves dropping what you're doing and taking a different pathway in life that makes you happier. If you ever need to talk to anyone I'm here. I wont pretend I have all the answers, but I won't judge you and will just listen. I think that it's very important to talk about depression. I know you can't talk to kitty anymore and I want you to know you can talk to me.
I feel like you're one of the less understood novians so it will no doubt help people in nova understand you better. I feel like I gained a lot of insight into the psychology of dragonite1127 from reading this post. You're a cool dude and should continue with your posts on the forums. I think especially when depression is concerned it helps a lot to share your story online. I hope you felt better writing it down and like a weight was lifted off your shoulders.
I want you to remember nobody is perfect Drago. Everyone has bad things going on in their life or terrible events that have taken place to effectively shape who they become. They just might not admit it due to immaturity and/or fear of vulnerability though.
I won't say the usual bollocks about finding inner love or anything like that. I'll just say that you need to take care of yourself and put yourself first. Even if that involves dropping what you're doing and taking a different pathway in life that makes you happier. If you ever need to talk to anyone I'm here. I wont pretend I have all the answers, but I won't judge you and will just listen. I think that it's very important to talk about depression. I know you can't talk to kitty anymore and I want you to know you can talk to me.
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Join date : 2018-01-27
Location : Onoxdorf Concentration Camp
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